By the middle of August he had heard nothing from Amy. He went often to the park but avoided looking for the white bird.
September came and had almost gone before he finally received a letter. The handwriting was without question hers. The postmark was that of a city many miles distant. He tore open the envelope and at first thought it was empty. Then he noticed a single white feather had fallen from it. In his mind, the white bird rose in flight and its wings let fly one feather. Were it not for the feather, no one would have known that the white bird had ever been. Thus he knew Amy would not be back, and it was many hours before he let the feather drop out of his hand.
倘若鸟儿回还
查尔斯是在同一时刻看到他们俩的:一只白色的小鸟和坐着轮椅沿着小径悠然而来的小女孩。小鸟滑翔而下,栖息在草地上;女孩子则平稳地驾着轮椅,穿行在阳光下婆娑的树影之间。她停下来看了看池塘里的鸭子,当她再次用手推动轮椅时,查尔斯一下子站了起来。“我来推你好吗?”他一边喊道,一边穿过草地朝她奔去。那只小鸟嗖地飞上了树梢。
大部分时间都是他在喋喋不休,他似乎害怕话一停,她就会请他离开,好让她独自呆着。从她的脸上看不出有任何缘于轮椅的无助表情,因而他知道,他的帮助并没有被看作是一种恩惠。他问起她致残的原因。
“我12岁那年出了一场车祸,”艾米解释说。
他们一起去吃午餐。幸好她能完全照料自己,不然他可就尴尬了。
“你和什么人住在一起吗?”第二天见面时他问。
“就我自己,”她答道。尽管他希望得到这样一个答案,但是问这个问题仍然让他有些不安,因为他自己也过得很孤独。
他开始喜欢把轮椅的白色手柄握在手里的感觉,喜欢在那两只镶有白边的金属轮子中间推车行走。他对她披在身后的、微微起伏的长发愈加熟悉,几乎超过了对她的眼睛和嘴唇的熟悉程度。有一次,他对着她波浪一般起伏的长发说:“真希望我是你生命中惟一为你推轮椅的人。”但她只是莞尔一笑,眼里没有任何表示。
6月里,她曾为他烧过一顿晚餐。她坐在轮椅上样样事情都能做,他以为她会为此而自豪的,但她仅仅把这视为一件理所当然的事,并无自豪感可言。发现这一点后,他不免有些怅然若失。他望着自己的手拿起盐瓶,把它放到一块较高的、不常用的碗柜搁板上,然后等着她请求帮助。他不明白自己为什么要这样做,但她的眼神让他意识到,他的恶作剧有多么残酷。为了让她忘掉他刚才的蠢行,他跟她谈起了公园里的那只小白鸟。
